The One In The Aftermath

Ok, here's the pilot. It's not really long but hey, it's my first time!

[Scene: A church somewhere in NY]

Minister: I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now...

[Fades to Ross' bedroom, 8am]

Rachel: Honey, wake up, wake up.

(Ross wakes up startled)



[Scene: Same as before]

Rachel: What?!?!

Ross: Oh, sorry.

Rachel: What the hell did you say that for?

Ross: It's a long story. Anyway (looks at clock) it's only 8 o' clock what are you waking me up for? Ross: 'Cause when the museum burnt down he knew I'd be out of work so he gave me the contract 'cause he knew that I was a very hard worker there.

Rachel: (hugs him) I love you for that!!

[Scene: Bloomingdale's, Ross and Rachel are arriving]

Sophie: Hey Rachel.

Rachel: Hi Sophie. You're here early.

Sophie: I thought you might need a hand.

Ross: I think we can manage.

Rachel: Come on then.

Ross: Yeah, whatever.

(They go into Joanna's (Rachel's former boss) old office. It's a complete mess)

Ross: In the words of Chandler, Could this place BE more untidy?

Rachel: It's not that bad.

Ross: Not that bad? Rach, Hiroshima didn't look this bad after it was nuked!

Rachel: You're exaggerating. I mean I'm sure the other office isn't this bad.

Ross: (opens door to adjacent office) Ok, its worse.

Sophie: (entering) everything OK?

(Ross gives her a 'duh?' look) Ross: You'd have thought she could've turned it back again!

Rachel: Ok, lets get sorted.

Ross: Yeah, Sophie, clear up in there will you?

Sophie: (ticked off) Fine!

[Scene: Central Perk, later on, Ross and Gunther present]

[In this scene, Gunther's thoughts are denoted by italics]

Ross: Can I get some coffee please Gunther.

Gunther: Sure. (under his breath) You took away the girl of my dreams so why don't I serve you some coffee.

(A couple enter,played by Jim Carrey and Samantha Janus)

Tom: (laughing) What an asshole. (notices Ross on couch) Ross?

Ross: Tom? Heeeey. Long time no see. How ya doin'?

Tom: I'm doin' fantastic. This is my girlfriend Louise.

Louise: Hi. Nice to meet you.

Ross: Hi.

(Rachel enters)

Louise: Rach?

Rachel: Louise?

Tom: Do you two know each other?

Louise: This is my sister.

Ross: Er...sister.

Rachel: Yeah. Who's this (referring to Tom)

Louise: This is my boyfriend Tom.

Tom: Hi.

Ross: So let me just get this straight. My fiancee's sister is the girlfriend of my old work pal?

Tom & Louise: (simultaneously) Fiancee?

(In the background Gunther drops the cup of coffee he is holding and spills it all over himself)

No commercials (it's the pilot!)

[Scene: Same as before]

Ross: Errr...

(Rachel gives him a 'Nice one' look)

Ross (in his head): Uh-oh. It's another one of those RUN FOR YOUR LIFE situations.

Louise: Rach, you never told me.

Rachel: No, I didn't.

Tom: Well anyway we have to get going.

Ross (in his head): There IS a God!!

(Louise and Tom leave)

Rachel: I thought we agreed not to tell anyone.

Ross: Yeah, like there's a rule or something.

Rachel: No, but...

Ross: Anyway, I already told Chandler, Monica, Joey and (realises Rachel isn't pleased) so how are Chandler & Monica doing these days?

Rachel: You told everyone?

Ross: Umm...(his beeper goes off)

Ross (cont'd in his head) There DEFINITELY is a God!!

Ross (cont'd) Ok, later (rushes out of the coffeehouse)

[Scene: Bloomingdale's, Ross and Sophie present]

Sophie: (from the other office) Finally!!

Ross: Done in there?

Sophie: What? Oh, yeah.

(Ross walks in to find everything either stuffed in drawers or thrown in cabinets etc.)

Ross: (sarcastic) Top class job, Sophie. (serious now) Explanation?

Sophie (in her head): RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!

Rachel (entering): Hey how's ever... aah!

Ross: Come on Sophie, give it a proper clean!

Sophie: It'll take days to do properly.

Ross: (nonchalantly) Yeah.

Rachel: OK, OK. It'll do for now. Sophie back to your office.

Sophie: Yes (under her breath) your highness.

(Sophie leaves)

Ross: Ok, Rache, I'll get sorted in here and you go in there, OK?

Rachel: Yeah, fine.

(Rachel leaves)

(Ross sits down and the buzzer rings)

Ross: (into buzzer) Yes.

Sophie (through buzzer) So you and Rachel are engaged huh?

(Ross' head falls on the desk)


[Scene: A church somewhere in NY, Ross is having the same dream as before]

Minister: You may now...

(Fades to Ross' bedroom)

Rachel: (sounds worried) Ross.



Rachel Green: Jennifer Aniston
Ross Geller: David Schwimmer
Sophie: Laura Dean
Gunther: James Michael Tyler
Tom Williams: Jim Carrey
Louise Green: Samantha Janus


Writer: Harrison Crecraft
Transcribed by: Harrison Crecraft

The title 'The One In The Aftermath', and the script are property of the above.

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